Yes yes, I know that
you’ve been desperately waiting for my posts for the past two months. Oh wait!!
That’s just me. The truth is that a lot of ideas keep coming to this highly
unused brain but then, typing burns a lot of calories. Probably more than 10,
which is a lot by my standards. But tomorrow also happens to be my exam, and I
am in the ‘I am desperate enough to do anything but study’ mode. So I therefore
came out of my temporary hibernation and naturally chose the most common and
relatable topic of the month, the Bored Exams (I’m pretty sure that’s the correct spelling).
This is for the poor class 12th chaps who have
just finished with their papers after being told a couple of years ago during
their 10th standard ‘Beta bas
ye do saal important hain..... Inme padh lo fir aage aish hi aish hai’.......
Remember these fancy words? Feeling betrayed aren’t you?
Well then let me make it easier for you and give you an insight
into the future. IT IS OVER....The
bubble has been burst.
Nothing is going to happen. It is just going to go downhill
from here and you’ll start hating your life even more. Motivational quotes like
‘Live your life to the fullest’, ‘It is not the end of world’, ‘You are
destined for so much’, ‘Marks do not matter’,
‘Enjoy the small moments’, or my favourite ‘YOLOatiwbigciim (You Only Live Once and that is while
browsing Google Chrome in incognito mode)’ are a farce.
Things will remain as they have always been and life will
seem like a big drag. Not to mention, you will live your entire life
quite the same way you have been, with the fun quotient decreasing every year.
I have therefore tried to prepare an almost exhaustive list of the type of
students you are and what you’ll do later in life (I really have no work to do AT ALL). This does not include once in a
decade exceptions like those mentioned in Shiv Khera and Robin Sharma books.
This is just a shallow observation of how a life of the student from a
middle-class family unfolds.
1. The Ruthless Toppers: You are
among the ones who scored 99.98412 in class 10 and then cried because of losing
that 1 mark in English as the correction was probably biased and the world was
conspiring against you and nothing was going your way. You’ll probably end up
scoring a devastatingly low 98 this time and you’ll mourn with your whole family and won't eat for a few days. If you’re from the science stream (you
probably are), you would either get into a decent enough engineering college (no
IITs; you obviously do not know the concepts you mugger) or your father is a
doctor or you’ll be an SRCC reject ending up in a Correspondence Course (as DU
is aiming for a 110 mark cutoff this time). You’ll end up getting the highest
marks in your college as well and then you’ll end up getting a good job after which you’ll either end up getting frustrated with your life or you’ll end up
cracking the civil services/being a CEO of a multinational company. The one thing you’ll never
do is regret your lifestyle. Sure, you will have your weak moments, you’ll get
teased by most people, but since it is in your blood and habit, you won’t stop and in
short.... You’ll END UP doing something worthwhile with your life. The End.
2. The ‘Yaar kuch aata hi nahi’ deceivers:
Before you start getting defensive, let me clarify that this is a relative category.
For eg. For A person who continuously sees red on his/her Report Card, A
Guy/Girl saying this and yet getting the passing marks is the culprit of this group; For the
latter, the person getting in 60’s is the one; with the chain finally stopping just below category #1. The truth is, it's not your fault. You have never been
really sure of yourselves and that is why you tend to take the safe route. You
always tend to be a bit pessimistic about yourselves and after scoring
relatively better marks you end up getting all the flak from your peers. You
will get good marks and end up in decent colleges where you will make a mark of
your own. You do come under the pressure of the society and tend to behave in
that way but you will still shine despite being in positions which do not suit
you. You might never be satisfied with your life ever, but people close to you
will recognise your efforts and always look up to you for guidance. You might
not get to do everything you ever wanted, but you’ll learn to compromise and
sacrifice and still find solace and happiness in that.
3. The Kaale Ghode: You silently scored
85-95 in 10th. You know things but rarely speak in front of the
teachers so they do not know about your talents. You will also score the same
marks in 12th but will surprise everyone in entrance exams by getting
into IITs or clearing your CA papers with outstanding marks. You’ll also be the
dark horses over there and will slowly polish yourselves to get the best
high-paying jobs available. You will always wonder what it takes to be at the
top, but you won’t complain, as money will buy you most of the things you ever
aimed for. In short, your lives will be super busy, you’ll have a lot of money,
but you’ll just be getting enough time to spend some of it.
4. The ‘Bhaunkne and not Kaatne waale’: You
have chewed off the mind and souls of almost all the teachers you’ve ever
studied under. Teachers tend to run away from you because you just irritate
them for no reason, ask unnecessary questions, and repeatedly fail to convert
your class heroics into marks. You will continue to do so with your college
teachers and your marks pattern will be the same. But this habit of yours will
bear fruit one day when you’ll find employers or colleagues of your kind and
you will prosper under them. You’ll mature with age and will use your speaking
prowess to your advantage.
5. The ‘Arts’ Waale: You are the
equivalent of Mothers in a society. You have the toughest and the most boring
subjects with you, and still you’ll be ridiculed by everyone...... throughout
your student life. Sentences like...... ‘Are Arts
liya? Tch tch tch’ will be the most compassionate thing you’ll ever hear.
At one point in life, you’ll get frustrated and do one of the following:-
·
Aim for Civil Services or join an NGO
·
Try becoming teachers
·
Have a mood swing and aim for unrelated things like MBA
and then fail at it.
·
Become successful artists in your respective
fields and prove everyone wrong (probably won’t happen)
But in the end, after
a few years, people will start looking up to you because the names of your
degrees will be unpronounceable and sound very learned. The same people who
made fun of you will seek advices from you for everyone and your time for
showing off your skills will start then.
6.
The BBA
(Back Benchers’ Assocation) Members: You made it through class 10 without having any notes, bunking all classes, and getting notes in your diaries and you still scored good
marks. You’ll continue to do so and still succeed in 12th too.
Things will get worse for you when you start your college life. The number and
the types of distractions will enable you to struggle with studies, no matter
what subject, stream or college you choose. Back Papers, low marks and lazy
attitude will define your character and you will plummet to new lows. But
after an adequate period of nadir, you’ll choose to settle and will finally
make your parents and relatives proud.
7.
The
‘Padhai Chhod ke kuch bhi karega’ bracket: This category is the most sought
after which swells to become an organisation by the time college life finishes.
You have wanted to participate in your passions since birth and are only
studying because the society asks you to do so. You will end up sacrificing
your talents somewhere midway through your college as you’ll be shouldered with
responsibilities but will inspire others to join your bandwagon. You’ll have short
bursts of showcasing your ‘other’ abilities throughout your lives but you might
never be able to pursue them diligently. But you’ll also be content in the end,
because you’ll find out, like everyone else above, that you never really had any other option.
So, I now realise that 7 categories aren’t enough to
accommodate millions of people, but I guess, that broadly, you’ve got the idea about
yours. And in the end, I have ended up doing what I hate the most. ‘Giving
Gyaan’. But life’s unfair. So, best of luck for your future, I guess. On my
part, I’ll try and come up with something more demeaning next time. Right now,
I am barely able to write anymore. So Good Night!!!